Indestructible

Our mam, she’s indestructible, she simply will not die

She just keeps on truckin’, no matter what we try

The poison that we give her, it is, to no avail

At ninety nine, she’s still here, and nothing does she ail

When we bumped her wheelchair, and she landed on the floor

Not a bone was broken, she just shook her fist and swore

We tried abandoning her, whilst shopping, and left her all alone

Then she chatted up a policeman, who sadly brought her home

We thought we’d pay a hit man, to completely do her in

But then she saw right through us, and gave him sex and gin

Next we tried starvation, and left no food to give her

Then she rang the curry house, and got them to deliver

Our mam, she’s clearly going nowhere, and will last forever

Out smart us every time, she will, as she’s wily and she’s clever

We can wave goodbye to our inheritance, alas, it has all gone

On, care home fees, chiropodists and the list goes on.

So it’s telegram territory, that we’re clearly looking at

And she will be elated, when it lands upon the mat

“It’s from the my friend, The Queen.” Is what she’ll tell us so

Dementia can be bittersweet, as I’m sure that you know

Resilient she has been, throughout, her full and active life

A fantastic mother, she has been, also a feisty wife

Honest and dependable and generous to a fault

If only we could be more like her, we’d be worth our salt.