From the Outside In

From the outside in is how it has always felt. Always there as an afterthought. In the background lurking but with a title bestowed as if that title was bestowed as some expected priviledge. There for all the celebrations, supporting silently the hardships but never included for the mundane, the ordinary, everyday scenarios. No quick message to say that you are thought of. No weekly phone call to catch up.

One family there is shared history and moments that can be called upon at a moment's notice, even if the memories are rose tainted dependent on who is wearing the spectacles. The other family remain close by but yet she felt like a stranger amongst them; always on the periphery, dipping in and out of moments.

Watching both sides, knowing she belonged but equally feeling disconnected and standing at a distance looking from the outside in. The feelings would rush at her and once more she felt the lonliness wrap around her like a fur coat as she watched the movie of these families play before her whilst she waited patiently in the wings, ready to be called upon to play her part once more.